On the first night after married couples often feel awkward and unsure of himself to engage in sexual activity in the bedroom, especially if supported by a lack of knowledge about it.
No need to worry, Dr.. Pulkit Sharma, a clinical psychologist and therapist psychoanalysis of Vimhans (Vidyasagar Institute of Mental Health, Neuro & Allied Sciences) India is ready to help you prepare for your first night ritual.
Consider the 8 things you need to consider before you and your partner have sex first recommended Dr. Sharma Timesofindia as reported on Wednesday (12/12/2012) following.
1. Safety is number one
Many people feel very emotional at the same time excited when having sex first but that does not mean they can sacrifice their own security because the sheer lust. Always use condoms to avoid an unwanted pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases. Make sure your spouse also care about it.
2. Do not expect too high
Although many people expect her first sex would be an unforgettable experience, but the fact that expectations were too high it will damage your first night, you will feel heartbroken and disappointed. Because everyone needs more time to learn to have sex with either sex or have the appropriate skill expectations.
3. Enjoy the foreplay
Sometimes it was so curious or excited, a lot of people who want to go straight to the peak of sexual activity such as penetration or orgasm. And fuck's pleasure lies precisely in foreplay activity.
Take advantage of the time you and your partner have to warm up and make yourself and your partner comfortable with foreplay. Even for first-time sex performed, the more his foreplay then sex you will get better.
4. Make sure you are sufficiently aroused before sex
If not, it will first sex painful and feels like a disaster.
5. Do not assume that he's an expert
Equally for the first time having sex, do not necessarily assume if your husband is an expert, although maybe she likes to brag about it. And she did it just because they feel embarrassed to admit that he felt insecure and inexperienced.
Communicate your desires with your partner and make sure not one of those who always led. Moreover turns leading the sexual activity will further add to the intimacy of family and sexual attraction between each other.
6. Pretending to be satisfied disappoint couples
Such problems often occur in married couples, even though they claimed this was done in order to satisfy their partner. And if the couple knows, he will feel ashamed and disappointed that lied that would end in the destruction of marriage.
So make sure you do not pretend to reach orgasm, especially on your first sex.
7. Orgasm is relative
Although orgasm has long been known to increase the satisfaction of having sex, you can still enjoy sexual activity without it. To that end, do not expect you or your partner reaches orgasm because orgasm is not the size of the actual lovemaking satisfaction but rather the process leading to orgasm itself.
If orgasm can happen is a good thing but if otherwise, go with the flow and enjoy the experience first.
8. Sensitive
First time sex may be painful but it seems that does not mean you or he's not a good partner to have the heart to hurt a partner.
So if you or the pain he felt, be open and honest in communicating, do not have a cover-up. Couples who are sensitive will certainly understand and care for each other as well as possible.
Most couples have intercourse at night with reason too hastily in the morning. But did you know 'dawn raid' there are many benefits. The interesting thing for women is to make more and more beautiful.
According to the research, adults who started the day with sex was not only feel more upbeat for the day, but also make the immune system stronger.
This study suggests that adults who make love in the morning are healthier and happier than couples who simply choose to start the day with a cup of tea and bread.
In addition to keep the body from getting a cold or the flu, morning sex can also improve the quality of hair, skin and nails.
"Having sex in the morning releases the chemical oxytocin, which makes couples feel loving and bonded all day," explains Dr Debby Herbenick, an American scientist, as reported by Mid-day, Friday (12/14/2012).
According to Dr. Herbenick, who is also the author of the book 'Because It Feels Good', making love in the morning make you stronger and more beautiful too.
"Sex in the morning can strengthen your immune system by enhancing your levels of IgA, an antibody that protects against infection. And it releases chemicals that raise levels of estrogen, which improves the texture of skin and hair," Dr. Herbenick.
Other studies suggest that the benefits do not end there. A study at Queens University in Belfast found that having sex three times a week could halve the risk of heart attack or stroke.
Meanwhile, research from the University of Nottingham revealed that men who regularly have sex in their 50s at a lower risk of prostate cancer.
The husband and wife who have been living together sometimes had a lackluster sex life. To solve each pair had to do some improvements in their sex lives in order to create harmony in the bedroom.
Here are 8 steps you need to do to improve a lackluster sex life, as reported by Men's Health, Saturday (15/12/2012), among others:
1. Sports as a couple
According to a study conducted at the University of Texas, researchers found that vigorous exercise can activate the sympathetic nervous system of women. Where the nervous system is also activated when a woman's sexual desire was burning. So that exercise is good for the body and also to evoke the mood to make love on the brain.
So are the men, various studies have shown that exercise can maintain the quality of sperm. So there is no harm if couples try to spend time alone with exercise for better sex life.
2. Use vibrator
In 2009, Dr. Debby Herbenick sexology expert found that the vibrator linked to positive sexual function, such as sexual arousal and facilitate greater person reaches orgasm.
3. Use grease
Lubricant can help vaginal lubrication in women and facilitate penetration. A study conducted in 2011 by experts at Indiana University, the use of lubricants can provide greater sexual pleasure and convenience.
4. Stimulate the mind
Women more likely to be distracted during sex when compared with men. To overcome this, researchers from the University of British Columbia study this and found that by focusing on the sights, sounds, and feelings of sexual desire and women will have greater sexual arousal and minimize distractions.
5. Trying new sex techniques
Try a new sex positions that can facilitate women to achieve orgasm. For example, a position in which he moved forward to press the base of the penis against her clitoris.
6. Increase the hugs, kisses, and touch
Intimacy is not all about sex and penetration, but you can deepen intimacy with each other as a couple kissing, touching, and give a warm hug.
7. Trying new activities together
It can trigger a hormone in the brain that are similar to the hormones that are released when you're in love, according to a study at SUNY-Stony Brook University. In this way the relationship intimacy couples would more closely.
8. Multitasking in bed
A survey of Indiana University found that having at least 4 or 5 sexual acts on each sex session can be a strong predictor of orgasm. So you are required to be creative when making love, such as penetration, touching sensitive areas, whispering words of romance and so on at one time.
Anxiety about sexual performance is one of the problems hindering sex life and is more common in men. This may be similar to normal anxiety, but anxiety about sexual performance more disturbing sexual intercourse.
A man who put too much emphasis on the final results, performance, and concerns about this may develop sexual performance anxiety. Unlike men, women see sex as a means to build closeness and intimacy in a relationship, so that women will not experience anxiety over sexual performance.
Conversely, some men consider sexual activity as a test to prove his manhood. To overcome performance anxiety, he must change his mindset and must realize that sex is not about doing, meet deadlines or are in compliance with the standards.
As reported onlymyhealth, Thursday (12/13/2012), men need to do 4 things is to be able to overcome sexual performance anxiety:
1. Overcome stress
Often anxiety or stress by external issues outside of the marital relationship may lead to sexual performance anxiety. It may also be due to the stress they felt the body due to consumption of excessive alcohol or coffee, or exposure to cigarette nikoton.
Try to remain calm in stressful situations and sort out the stress by making lifestyle changes to become healthier sex lives are not disrupted.
2. Do not be too pushy
What do you think has a close connection with sexual activity. If the mind is not willing to enjoy sexual activity, performance anxiety will increasingly distance themselves from the sex you are qualified.
The right attitude is the key to overcoming performance anxiety during sex. He needs confidence is a prerequisite for enjoying sex. In addition, instead of trying so hard to sex to satisfy your partner, you should try to let it flow naturally.
3. Relaxing in the face of sex
Do not blame yourself if things do not go as desired. Sexual activity is governed by the subconscious mind, so keep your body stay relaxed during sexual intercourse. Men can easily satisfy your partner if he feels comfortable. Stay relaxed and unhurried, but enjoy sex.
4. You and a partner
Anxiety during sex may also arise due to the discomfort of the couple. Therefore, you and your partner need to overcome sexual performance anxiety before engaging in any sexual activity.
Also, do not force to have sex if both parties are filled with anxiety. You can make a couple feel comfortable in a variety of ways such as with mutual stroking, touching and cuddling. This helps you in order to improve the quality of communication with a partner that can provide comfort.
Increasingly certain age a woman's sexual desires will decrease. But recently a new study has revealed the surprising finding that despite his desire to decline, middle-aged women have increased sexual satisfaction when having sex with their partner.
This was revealed by a team of researchers from the University of California, San Diego School of Medicine and Veterans Affairs San Diego Healthcare System after evaluating the activity and sexual satisfaction were reported by 806 women who took part in the Rancho Bernardo Study.
The average age of participants in this study noted 67 years and 63 percent of the participants reported to be entering a period of post-menopausal women. But half of the participants had a spouse who is still active in sexual activity in the past 4 weeks.
The study measured the prevalence of sexual activity participants carried out later; characteristics associated with sexual activity including demographics, health, and hormone use; frequency stimulation, lubrication, orgasm, and pain during sexual intercourse, as well as the desire and sexual satisfaction in older women.
"In fact, only 1 in 5 women are active sex and reported high sexual desire," said lead researcher Elizabeth Barrett-Connor, MD, professor and head of the Division of Epidemiology, Department of Family and Preventive Medicine, University of California, San Diego School of Medicine.
"By contrast, an estimated half of women aged 80 years and over reported more arousal, lubrication and orgasm experience all the time but rarely have sexual desire. This contrasts with the traditional model of sex where sexual desire precedes also shows that women are willing to engage in sexual activity because of motivated a variety of reasons, including confirmation of the relationship or obligation to provide inner and outer living in couples, "he added.
Although older age has been hailed as a significant indicator of low sexual satisfaction, the percentage of women who were satisfied with their sex lives actually increases with age. Even estimated half of women aged 80 years and over reported almost always or always experiencing sexual satisfaction.
Moreover, apart from the youngest participants, the oldest participant is also known to have an orgasm satisfaction highest among the other participants.
"From these studies it is known that sexual activity is not merely necessary to obtain sexual gratification. Those who experience it, received satisfaction through touching, fondling or other forms of intimacy that has been sustained in the long-standing relationship," said another researcher, Susan Trompeter as reported of Timesofindia, Thursday (13/12/2012).
According Trompeter, emotional and physical closeness with a partner that is regarded as more important than orgasm. So positive approach to female sexual health are more focused on sexual satisfaction seems to be more useful than just pay attention to sexual activity or disfungsinya only.
The study has been published in the American Journal of Medicine.
